How I See It: Use Your Voice
I do not believe that your circumstances make up your identity. I do not believe life is now how it will always be and who you are can never change. I didn’t always think this way, but I believe it now.
One of the biggest questions I think a lot of us ask is, “Why?” Why do we lose the ones we love? Why do we have to fight battles we do not choose? Those are the two biggest. When we lose something or someone, something happens – we stop living.
We all have to face these questions, sometimes more than once. It isn’t easy. We try and beat the odds, while all at the same time keeping the fear of the unknown from sight. We are afraid of what is slowly being taken away and hoping it will all be over soon. But sometimes it never goes away. So what do you do when body armour isn’t helping you? Feel. Feel what hurts so much. Feel what has been hiding. Feel what you are afraid of.
At the point of breaking, I realized that a doctor may not be able to ever heal me, but I could. I had the power to heal. While my life had been lined up, I accepted the fate that I was given. When my life had brought me to my lowest, when I thought there was nothing else I could do, I remembered who I was. I had never given up on myself, and I wasn’t going to now. I would not allow myself to lose everything I cherished. It was not going to take more than I would let it. This will not destroy me. It may challenge me, it may break me, but it will not destroy me. I am one voice. That is a challenge in itself. But with all the odds against me, I am stepping away. I believe that the good things we build will end up building us one day.
So, perhaps your story is something we could all learn from. Tell it. It will be a story that not many will ever be able to tell. And when you tell your story, maybe it will put a smile on someone’s face, or maybe it will break someone’s heart. Let it. Our lives are all lessons that only we can instil upon each other. What is within you is within you alone. Never silence what is meant to be heard. Never give up. Stand tall, dream big. Make no excuses.
Maybe people can see through you when you walk by, maybe they can hear the pain in your voice, or see the hurt in your eyes. I cannot deny that my scars will always remain, however, I have given it a voice. I have allowed my grief to speak. I believe that if you allow yourself, you can become stronger in the very place you are broken.
Ivana was born in Sanski Most, Bosnia & Herzegovina but moved to Canada at the age of 3. She was diagnosed with LGMD a few years ago and it has forever changed her life. She is a regular contributor and her blogs will be everything she has learned along the way and what she continues to learn today. Read Ivana’s personal blog at: www.loveivana.com